Wednesday, April 25, 2018

Laugh It Up

Thirteen years ago, in a hospital room filled with doctors and nurses and family, my oldest daughter made her first appearance.  

Eight years ago, I held her hand as we walked into Kindergarten registration.

Five years ago, I was chasing this pretty little girl around Tennessee.

Two years ago, I was watching her settle into life here on the farm.

And today?  Today she is a teenager.  My Emerson is 13. 

I could tell you that she's smart and beautiful and kind, because all of that is true, but she's more than that.  

She loves her brothers and sister...

And she loves to have fun with them.

She loves cats...

And I think she might actually be turning into a cat.

She will scoop up a squirming baby duck,

let the wind whip through her hair on the boat,

give herself an impromptu mud mask at the pond,

and she'll make her own fun as often as she can.

She moved up to Middle School this year, and as you can see, she was very excited for the new adventure!

Also, unbeknownst to her, I might have changed a few things on her class electives list without her knowing.  She was sure surprised to see that "somehow" she had been assigned to Theater Class her first semester.  She begged and pleaded for me to have her schedule changed, but I told her she'd just have to tough it out.  And you know what?  Theater turned out to be her very favorite class.  

To make matters worse, when I told her she had to choose an after school activity or I was making her run cross-country, she went kicking and nearly screaming to audition for Mezzo Voce, an honors choir, and had to sing a solo in front of a whole room full of students.  (I am SO mean.)  Of course she was chosen as a member.  She had a great time traveling to college campuses to sing with other choirs and when they competed at Festival, their group came away with the coveted "1" ranking.  Miss Wilson, who taught Theater and led Mezzo Voce, was a great role model for both groups.  

And, I am happy to report, those angelic voices and fancy dresses and shirts and ties didn't prevent all kinds of fun from happening!

Then there is the matter of braces.  Dun, dun, dunnnnnn.  Although she needed them, she was dreading the day she'd actually get them.  And, as I sat in the Orthodontist's office, waiting for it all to be over, I got a text message.  From Emerson.  While she was getting her braces on.  And well, she also managed to find her sense of humor in that situation, and I knew it would all be okay.  What else could I do but laugh?

This year for her birthday, she again chose to have a sleepover.  And again she chose truffles and ice cream over cake or cupcakes.  But there were subtle changes among the girls.  Little things like just a wave from the parents during drop off instead of hugs and kisses, and instead of just socks and t-shirts scattered around the bedroom there were bras and mascara mixed in.  

Middle school.  Braces.  Bras.  It's happening.  

When I asked her what she thought I'd write about in her birthday blog post this year, she said I would say that she's one of my favorite children.  I'd have to say she's correct.  Maybe there will come a time when I'm not cool to hang out with, but that time is not here yet.  I think if you treat kids how you'd like to be treated, and if you take time to really get to know them and have fun with them, you're ahead of the game.


I still see her as my little girl with the freckles and giggles and carefree spirit.

But I also see the young woman she is becoming.  

Emerson has a way about her.  She can find the humor in any situation.  I think, if she can hold on to that as she forges onward into these next few years of her life, she's going to have the upper hand on this thing we call Life.   

Happy birthday, Emmer Schlemmer.  Mom loves you!

Monday, March 12, 2018

Red, White and Blue

I can't remember a time when I wasn't wildly patriotic.  Growing up, I spent my summers on a lake in Northern Michigan and July 4th was always elaborately celebrated.  There's just something about that red, white, and blue, you know?

In college, I was assigned to a VA hospital for my internship in Therapeutic Recreation.  I worked with veterans suffering from PTSD, and Substance Abuse issues. It was then when I learned what happens after these men and women are finished with their service.  Sure, they voluntarily signed up to protect our country, but I'm not so sure they knew all of the sacrifices they would make and the long term struggles they would go through.  Then, 9/11 happened, and America was changed.  Everywhere you looked you could see love for our great country.  And while we were here, settling into a "new normal", our military men and women were being deployed overseas to fight for us.  What kind of people leave their husbands and wives and children and families to lay their lives on the line for their country?  Heroes, that's who.  Every single man and woman who raised their hand when the shit hit the fan is a hero.

And when we started having children, we made sure they knew how lucky they are to live here.  We talk about 9/11; we talk about Vietnam; we talk about why WWII happened; we talk about slavery and the Civil War.  We have made sure that the sacrifices our military have made are not lost on our little family.  It is considered a lucky day when we get to see or talk to someone in uniform.  My children and I are in awe, as we should be.  We celebrate them at parades, and special events, at the Marine Corps Ball and of course, on July 4th.

 When I ran the 2015 Chicago Marathon, I first noticed it: a sea of red shirts.  Who were these people?!  Must be some kind of team, I guess.  I saw them randomly throughout the race, something about veterans written on their backs and an eagle on the front of their shirts.  It seemed kind of cool.  And then, last year at the Bayshore Marathon, I saw the red shirts again with the eagles.  Team RWB.  What is Team RWB?  I had no idea, but I as soon as I got in my car, I googled it:

"Team RWB's mission is to enrich the lives of America's veterans by connecting them to their community through physical and social activity."

As I read about their purpose and who was involved, I knew that this was an organization I wanted to be a part of.  They were looking for veterans and civilians who were interested in making genuine and authentic connections with our veterans to enrich their lives.  And all I could think was, "Who wouldn't want to be a part of that?"

So, I signed up, got my shirt, joined the Flint Chapter of RWB, and finally made it out to a social with my family near the end of last summer.  I met our chapter captains and some of the other members of the group, and when they asked if I was ex-military and I said no, I wasn't quite sure how to explain why I wanted to be a part of RWB.  But, they accepted me anyway, and I was honored to wear the Eagle to run the Marine Corps Marathon last fall.  What I didn't know was that being a part of Team RWB meant that I had a family wherever I was.  The race was filled with Team RWB shirts and every time I passed a runner wearing that red shirt, or was spotted by someone in the crowd who was a member, there were high fives and cheers and "EAGLE UP" being yelled.  The sense of camaraderie I felt from these complete strangers was unbelievable.

As time passed, I attended more events-laying wreaths at our military cemetery for Wreaths Across America, fun social events, volunteering at the food bank here in town, and even removing those same wreaths at the end of the holiday season. When our captains found out I was a runner, it was only a matter of time before they asked me to be the Run Coordinator for our chapter.  I gladly took on the position because I wanted to be more involved and what better way than running, right?  

The great thing about Team RWB is the support, in every aspect of the organization.  They didn't name me a leader and say, "Now go do it!"  They make sure their leaders are trained and that they have all the resources they need available to them.  This past weekend, I was given the opportunity to attend a training academy in St. Louis, with not only other Midwest leaders, but also some leaders from the Southern region, as well.   So, about 37 Team RWB leaders flew and drove to St. Louis last Friday, for a weekend to remember.  

There were three of us planning to attend the academy from the mid-Michigan area, so we decided a road trip was in order. We left Thursday night, stopped in Indianapolis overnight, and then headed for Missouri.  Along the way, we took a little detour to check out an old covered bridge and then we found ourselves in Casey, Illinois among the World's Largest Rocking Chair, Wind chime, Pencil, Mailbox, Golf Tee and Pitchfork.  

And then it was time to get to St. Louis.  At the hotel, several members had already arrived, so we quickly checked in and then had some time to hang out prior to our evening meetings.  We spent that first night getting to know each other.  We each took turns standing and introducing ourselves and telling why we were a part of Team RWB.  There were veterans, and people from military families, but there were also civilians other than me who felt the way I did.  The very best part was when one of the leaders, who had been deployed many times stood up and basically said, "We don't give a shit if you're a veteran or a civilian.  We are all equals in Team RWB."  And I think I needed to hear that.  We are all a part of this for the same reasons-we all want to enrich the lives of veterans.  From there, we had a casual pizza dinner where we were encouraged to get outside of our little chapter circle and meet new people.  And what do you know?  I met a bunch of runners.  I even met a few who ran ultras.  And if you know me, that's a fast way to my heart.

Early on Saturday I joined a few runners for some sunrise miles over the Mississippi and then we had a larger group run to the arch.  

The rest of Saturday was filled with small and large group activities and we were given many opportunities to speak to other chapters and to get and give ideas and to just share our stories.  The day was filled with laughter and teamwork and nothing but positivity.  

That night, we headed to the City Museum for dinner and exploration.  Let it be known, this was less of a museum and more of a work of art and an adventure.  The old building has been converted into a multistory maze of caves and slides and hands-on activities and an outdoor jungle gym of epic proportions.  We climbed and crawled and slid for hours.  I was even somehow coerced into climbing through that wire tunnel waaaaay up there, despite my fear of heights.  

We were there for several hours, but I am quite certain I didn't even see half of what was inside.  It was truly amazing.

And just like that, it was Sunday.  We started the day with breakfast and a little RWB yoga.

After a few more small group sessions, we headed out in the snow/rain to get a team picture near the arch.  To passersby, you'd never guess that we weren't all lifelong friends.  The bonds that we made in just three days were strong.  We were laughing and hugging and taking selfies and just having fun.

We headed back to the hotel for one last exercise: The Circle of Gratitude.  

Half of the team sat in a circle with their eyes closed and the other half stood behind them.  As we walked in a circle, we touched the shoulders of those who we shared a connection with, or a smile, or a tear, or someone who taught us something, or someone who had made our experience just a little more meaningful.  If any of us had any doubts at the beginning of that exercise, we surely did not by the end.  We had learned that opening up and being vulnerable makes you stronger, not weaker.  

We came together as a group of 37 men and women from all walks of life, but we left as a family.  We made connections that will stand the test of time and learned more about ourselves in the process.

At the end, when we received our leadership patches, we weren't given handshakes, we were given hugs.  

I truly believe that you get out of things what you put into them, and each and every person there this weekend, lives that way.  They came with open hearts and open minds and had the time of their lives.  

If you are interested in becoming a member of Team RWB (why wouldn't you be), please contact me or go to for more information.  It costs nothing to join, but I guarantee you will be richly rewarded for your efforts in supporting our great American veterans.  

I'm just going to leave you with this little clip of my daughter singing.  I found it on my phone the other day and had no idea she had recorded it.